Learning

The other day while we were on a walk we realized that we have almost been gone a month. All of us remarked on how fast it had gone by and yet so much has happened in this last month. I ask the question, “I wonder if the next 5 months will go by fast or slow?” Bob looked at me and said, “Oh, I am sure that it will go by much faster.”
             Today we have officially been gone for a month and I don’t know how I feel about these next 5 months going by fast. In one way I am excited because I will see my family soon but I will also have to leave Bangladesh, which is beginning to feel like a home. It means that I will have to leave these children and possibly (most likely) never see them again. Sometimes when I have a moment to just sit down and relax I just think of how happy I am to be here at the present time. I cannot express how much I love seeing the kids and walking around the village and I’m beginning to enjoy teaching. It allows me to be a goof ball in front of the kids and they don’t seem to care at all! They have taught me so much and so has this whole trip in general.
             On my way back from Dhaka I began a list of things I have learned since I have arrived in Bangladesh:
              1. God really does have people in every religion (hindu and muslim) who may not hold                   the truth yet but are honestly and earnestly seeking the true God.
             2. People are more afraid of change than almost anything else.
             3. When you give your fears, desires, and burdens to God you truly do receive peace that passes all understanding.
             4. Family is the most beautiful thing that God created. They support you; even when you are 10,000 miles away.
             5.Children can never receive too much love.
             6.You can’t always be right so you should be willing to laugh at yourself when you’re wrong.
             7. Things don’t always happen the way you plan or want them to happen. But when God’s in control they always work out the way they are suppose to.

             I’m going to be honest and say that this experience hasn’t been what I was expecting but it has already helped me grow in so many ways. God has been shaping me so that I will be able to more effectively serve Him here and when I return home. He has comforted and strengthened me through this whole month and He will continue to do it! I received a small package from WWU today. It mostly had reading material and a few other things. There were so many comforting words in it from people at College and from the people in the Mission’s office. I looked at the day that they had sent it: October 13, 2011. That was one of the hardest days that I had here and that was the day that a package of love was sent my way. God is so good he cares about the small stuff.

A Broken Spirit

Sabbath is beautiful.


            Every time that day comes I know that it is a gift from God. Right now I am sitting on my back porch watching the sunset and the moon rise up in the sky (there is also a snake swimming in the pond). Bangladesh is so beautiful this time of year because of the lush rice fields. In a few weeks they will begin to dry up and soon it wont be as pretty. I’ll enjoy the scenery while it lasts.
             Today was a great day full of adventures and fellowship. Lauren and I were the only ones that showed up to the English Sabbath school that is taught by the Waids. We studied about righteousness by faith and how the time of Jesus coming is getting closer. As I am getting older I am beginning to believe this more and more, Jesus is coming soon to take us all home (I find a lot of comfort in that). We had church and lunch and then we went to the village Sabbath school. This event has become one of my favorite parts of the week. There is something so special about teaching Jesus to kids who have never heard of Him before. Today I told the story of Daniel and the Lions den. When describing that Daniel had been thrown in I asked them, “Do you think that Daniel was alive in the morning?” All of them yelled “nooooooooo.” It was such a surprise when they realized that God had rescued Daniel from the lions and that he didn’t even have a rip in his clothing.  Sometimes I let the stories in the bible become old and I forget about how amazing they really are.
             When we returned from the village Sabbath school I sat down with some of the kids and played. As the days go by I realize more and more how important it is to just love them. Luke came up to me and grabbed my hand. Then he looked at me with anger written all over his face and he said, “Chantel, I love you no. You promised to take me to village school and you didn’t.” I was shocked, earlier in the day he had asked me if he could go and I had told him to ask Ponwell or Grammy if he could go (we usually don’t take the Kindergarten class). After that he let go of my hand and wandered off somewhere to cry for the next 20 minutes. I don’t know what to do with Luke because he has suffered so much damage from his mother giving him up. He demands my strict attention and I desperately want to give him all the attention I can but it is so hard when there are so many other children that need love and attention as well. This isn’t the first time that he has been upset with me and I’m sure it isn’t the last.  It hurts me to see his broken spirit.
             The pain is evident in many of the kid’s faces. You can tell that what has happened in their past has hurt them more than I could ever imagine. Some of them don’t smile that often and others act up in bad ways so that they can get attention. It reassures me that I am needed here; even if it is just to love the kids with all of my heart.
             I don’t know how to handle Luke yet but I’m scared that he is going to drain me because of his temperamental behavior.  He has picked me out to be his “mom” and I let him down all the time and it is crushing me to hurt him. I wont let this ruin my day but it just makes me sad to see the effects of sin. Yes, I take great comfort in knowing Jesus is coming soon to take us home. 



            
            

Content in Bangladesh

"For I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances."  

             Paul tells us in Philippians 4:11 that he had learned to be happy in whatever circumstance he was in. I’ve always marveled at the idea of Paul being happy even while he is in prison, it just doesn’t make sense. However, I am beginning to understand what it is like to be content with where God has placed you in life. The sun is currently going down and Sabbath is approaching and although I miss my family back at home I am so glad that I am here in Bangladesh. I feel like “content” is the only word that I can use to describe how I feel about my current condition.
             I have been sick these last few days and one night while I was laying awake in my bed, feeling miserable, I started thinking that if  my sickness got worse I might have to be sent home. It shocked me to realize that that is the last thing that I want to happen. In the morning when I went on my typical walk I noticed how beautiful it was outside. The fog was beginning to lift off the earth and the sunbeams were beginning to light up the rice fields. As I was walking I felt like God wrapped his arms around me and reminded me that this is where I am suppose to be at the moment… not America. God showed me that there is nothing for me to do in America at current time. 
             Today we went into town after breakfast. It was so much fun! I am beginning to realize that I am getting use to most of the sights around here. It doesn’t bug me that people paint their animal’s highlighter colors to mark which one is theirs (have you ever seen a bright pink chicken?), the men wear skirts, or that people stare at us everywhere we go. However, there are still some things that I will probably never get use to. For example when anyone needs to get flem out of their throat they are not quiet about it at all. They carry the chickens to be eaten by their feet in groups of 6-8 (all of them alive and upside down). The woman just let their urine flow down their Shari’s and the men go wherever they please, not matter whose around. There is this dog that lives by the school whose front leg looks like an accordion because he has been hit by something (all of the dogs are so badly treated here). And the last thing I will never get over are the bugs. They have a saying that when you’re in Bangladesh and you think you feel a bug on you… you have a bug on you.  It is so true! I have a green bug net over my bed but the bugs still get in so I have to fumble around at night and pick them off in the dark. My grandma finds it hilarious that I have to pick dead ants off of my cough drops before I eat them.
             Something I could definitely get use to is the food cooked by our chef Shati! In the morning we generally have Dahl and rice (mixed with wheat for nutrition). Dahl isn’t very good in other places because they make it extremely watery because they are so poor; but when Shati makes it, it is nice and thick. Dahl is a bean they cook and mix with spices. For fruit we get fresh pineapple, pomelo (which is like a huge sweet grapefruit), bananas, pomegranates, coconuts, and the occasional orange! Shati has somehow come to the conclusion that I don’t like her cooking and she always asks me what she should make for dinner so that I wont starve. She doesn’t understand that I have a small stomach that is always stretched more than it ever has been after every meal I eat. I might come back to America fat because the food is so delicious but here fat=healthy!
             The people are also amazing! The kids have stolen my heart and so have the other teachers and workers! Bani came into town with us today as our translator. She is a fun person to shop with because she knows everything about the stores in Hili. I bought a shari today and she taught me how to put my hair up using one chop stick! I definitely could get use to the people!
             I may never get a chance to live in another country for 6 months and experience its culture again. So why would I not be content? I’m ready to live life to the fullest and before I know it I will be home telling all of you about the amazing Bangladeshi people and culture!

Be content with where God has placed you today! He has a plan that is far better than we could even imagine! Whether you are at home with babies, about to head off to work, or even unsure of what the day holds for you, be joyful for what God has planned!  

This is Heather and I on a Rickshaw ride in Dhaka (Heather, Lauren, and I just swapped pictures so I decided to put this up even though it doesn't go with the post)! 

This is Rice (with wheat) and Dahl! It is so yellow because of the turmeric spice. Mrs Waid. always says, "Turmeric is the spice of Bangladesh." 

            

Missionary Forever

             I am finally happy with the idea of being a teacher because it gives me a purpose here in Bangladesh. The only problem I have is that I don’t really have much to go off of. I wasn’t trained by anyone on how to teach 2^nd graders and I was only given two books. The first book is for English and it only contains short stories for the kids to read and the other is a very short book about animals for science. Now I am suppose to take these stories and somehow come up with a curriculum without worksheets, ideas, games, or teacher’s guides. This is my current struggle.  It might be time to raid the school and see what teaching material they are hiding from me.  There are so many things I would have brought if I only knew what I would be doing.
             I love my students even though it has been a struggle to make them pay attention. I’m training them not to stand up and walk around in the middle of class. They seem to be trying to see how much they can get away with but they are beginning to realize that I’m not going to be their playmate while I’m teaching. Reisa was angry with me the first day because I wouldn’t call on her when she would scream “AMI” (bangla for “me”) and start running to the front of the room. Now she is one of the best behaved girls!
             Pat Lundy from my church gave me three boxes of cute band aids to give away to the kids here. A few days ago I dug them out because I had cut myself with scissors (the dull tipped ones, don’t ask how I was capable of doing so much damage with the most pathetic scissors). As soon as I walked out of my apartment the kids began to notice the colorful sticker on my finger. Now whenever the kids get the slightest injury they come running up to me and ask for a Band-Aid. I haven’t decided if I feel like their personal nurse or like the Band-Aid Queen! I think I prefer Band-Aid Queen. Hahah!
             As the days continue to fly by I can tell that God is renewing my strength. It is evident in the way that my sense of humor is coming back; I’m as quirky as ever. God is Good.

I was flipping through a songbook today and I found some very familiar and yet comforting words:

“Oh, to grace how great a debtor,
Daily I’m constrained to be!
Let thy goodness, like a fetter
bind me closer still to thee,
Prone to wander, Lord I feel it,
Prone to leave the God I love,
Here’s my heart- oh take and seal it,
Seal it for they courts above.”

We are all prone to leave the God we love but I’m determined to continue giving God my heart. My mom told me before I left that I should look into becoming a medical missionary. I’m still not sure about the medical part but I am definitely going to be a missionary forever. I am so excited about being a missionary in America when I get back. There are so many people all around us (not just in Bangladesh) who need Love, a comforting touch, and Jesus Christ! I hope you all take advantage of the fact that you can speak the same language as the people that you are around. It is such a blessing it is to share what God has done in your life. I may be able to love the kids here but there is almost no way of expressing what Jesus has done in my life to the villagers around me.  So for now I will just love the kids with all my heart and continue to follow God’s guiding.

I pray that you all have a wonderful day!
Become a missionary and share what Jesus has done in your life… wherever you are!

It's Not About Me, It's All About Jesus!

“This is where God wants me to be, this is where God wants me to be.” I told myself this sentence over and over again as I let the tears fall down my face. Being a missionary is harder than I though it would be and sometimes the only thing I have to hang onto is the fact that this is where God wants me to be.
             Yesterday was terrible because I let it be terrible. Teaching wasn’t that bad although I fumbled a bit because I had no clue what I was doing and I had time left over at the end (now I am beginning to understand why teachers always gave us busy work).  I haven’t been emotionally stable since I’ve been here. One moment I’ll be so happy that I’m here and the next moment I feel like there isn’t enough work for me to do and it is pointless for me to be here. I was running on my own energy yesterday and by the time I got to the end of the day I was emotionally exhausted and the only thing I felt like I could do to relieve all that was find a place to be alone and let the tears flow. I’m not much of a crier but when I do it is really pathetic.
             Finally I realized that I couldn’t do it on my own and I had completely pushed out Jesus, the only one who could give me enough strength to get through this life. By then it was bedtime and so I poured out my heart and surrendered to Jesus and prayed that the next day would be better. In the morning I read Romans 12: 2, which says “Let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will know what God wants you to do, and you will know how good and pleasing and perfect his will really is.”  I realized how much I had let my negative thinking impact me and that had clouded my faith in God and his will for my life.
             Today has been better. Not amazing, but better because I realize that it isn’t about me, it is all about Jesus!! My second grade class is rather crazy and they don’t like to raise their hands or sit in their seats correctly. However, I’m laying down the rules and they are already beginning to respond. Marjorie sits in the back but she is the angel student who does everything that I tell her to. Brittney sits in the front and she never does what I asked her to. It is so interesting to see their little characters shine out in the classroom. There are 12 kids and only one of them is a boy (poor Joshua). They are going to try to have him skip a grade so that he can be with the other boys. I’m going to be honest, teaching can be fun even though it is difficult and I’m interested to see how the next few days will go.
             In the afternoon I had other tasks to keep me busy.  We are sorting through the kids clothes right now and pulling out the winter clothes and also bringing out the new Sabbath dresses. It is a huge task that takes far to long and everyone helps. While I was sitting down with the group I saw little Noah (he’s probably around the age of two) out in the yard and I signaled him to come over to me. I pulled him up onto my lap and he just sat there for a very long time and became very relaxed. I have never felt so content and happy at Bangla Hope as I did while holding baby Noah this afternoon. Mrs. Waid says that Noah doesn’t get enough attention here and because of that he is a very shy boy. I never had seen him smile until a few days ago when I decided to pick him up and tickle him after that he has always run up to my legs and held onto me. I may not always feel like I am being very productive here but I am showing these kids love and maybe that is the only reason that God has brought me here and I’m okay with that. Holding Noah has reminded me that it is not about me, it is all about Jesus and the little ones that He has brought me to in Bangladesh. 


(I'm sure you've noticed that all my posts have a spiritual little message mixed in. All of my posts will probably have that because Jesus is my number one and He gives me strength to make it through each day!) 

Updates

Danny is like the average kid who forgets that he hates you. Thank goodness! He came into my room after church today and started talking his head off. He also gave me another picture to give to Kelsey, which means I’ve still got his trust. I showed him and Caleb what candles are (they had never seen them before) and they really liked to smell them. It was very difficult to get them to stop putting their faces right next to the flame once they were lit. Boys and fire are a scary combination.
             I have a few things that I need prayer for. I’m scared about teaching tomorrow and to be honest I am not ready at all (and I should be). I’ll be teaching English, science, and art and the one I’m concerned about is English. I have an hour and the teacher (she teaches the kids Bangla and Bangla Math) only gave me two pages to read in a book. That is like a total of four sentences! So basically I don’t know what on earth I’m doing.  I also need prayers for my health. Everyone here has been sick except for me but I am finally starting to feel terrible and my throat hurts pretty badly right now.  Like I said in the previous post, the devil is trying to get me down but Jesus has been sending me little messages the whisper “I love you.” For example it rained today, something I would have never asked for in America but in this insanely hot country it was so refreshing.
             On to another topic: I am beginning to feel like God is wanting me to start working with the kids in the villages. Today when we were sitting with the kids at Sabbath school I looked down at this one girls foot. It was all dirty and skin was peeling off because she walked barefoot everywhere. As I looked up toward her face I noticed how dirty and skinny she was but as soon as she made eye contact with me she had the most beautiful smile. I love the kids at the orphanage but I feel my heart going out to the kids that really have nothing. I’m trying to figure out something that I can do to get out there and help these kids that I cannot even communicate with. Any suggestions?

Here are some pictures of today's happenings:

Here I am about to walk to the Village Sabbath School with several of the kids who are going to be doing the song service. 

Can you tell who sticks out? hahah. 

Here is Cloe, Sherry, Jenny, and Sheeba in front of the beautiful rice fields! 

Have a wonderful Sabbath everyone!

Don't Let the Devil Get You Down!

            He stood there with his face completely full of anger and then it turned to sadness as the tears began to flood his eyes. Danny didn’t say anything to me as he just stared into my eyes with sorrow that could not be matched. It was my fault.
             Earlier today Luke had come to my room and found a little booklet that Danny had given to Heather for Kelsey (the previous Student Missionary).  I didn’t really pay attention when Brent and Luke began to draw all over the blank pages. By the time night came Luke dragged me to the boys room so that he could draw me more pictures to put on my wall. While he was busy doing that I was getting overwhelmed with tons of kisses from the other boys (wow that sentence sounds a little funny haha).  I was filled with joy as all the boys were so happy with me and that is when Danny came storming in. He stood there for 5 minutes and didn’t say a word to me, he just slowly began to cry.  Then the ladies started giving the familiar hints that it was time for me to go so that the boy could go to bed.
             Now I sit here feeling terrible about the silliest thing. I’m really hoping that Danny is like the average kid that will just forget in about a day. But it isn’t just that I made him completely angry or mad it was also that you could see his love for Kelsey in every tear that he let run down his face and I felt like I had insulted it. Most of these kids have rejection issues or need a lot of attention and love because they don’t have parents to spoil them. No matter how silly I think the matter is that he cried it still breaks my heart and I feel like a terrible person. Earlier today I felt like I could conquer the world and now I feel like the lowest scum of the earth.  I don’t even know what to do to make it right.
             Many times in my life I don’t really know what to do or what the right way is and because of that I have made so many mistakes. It is hard to know what to do sometimes but I believe that as we focus on Jesus that everything will work it’s way out. I may have made Danny sad but I cannot let the Devil get me down because of that one thing. Satan really has been working hard at not only making me upset but also the other people here. I have to remember that I am a conqueror because of Christ.

Earlier today I wrote this (before Danny got upset): “They say that with the death of Christ you can conquer anything and today I feel like a conqueror even though I haven’t done anything particularly amazing. I simply feel like I have conquered the day because I am not letting my fears overwhelm me and I am claiming the blood of Jesus! “

         Satan can’t mess with the power that comes as a result of Jesus’ death on the cross! Therefore I shouldn’t let my fears about teaching, being away from home, or having Danny hate me forever keep me away from doing God’s will.

I may still feel horrible but I will just go to bed tonight and tomorrow I’ll say sorry to Danny somehow. 

Pictures!

Finally I have some pictures for you guys. We still can’t upload many so I picked 5 so that you guys would have proof that I am actually in Bangladesh. 

This first picture is of a grandpa and a baby in the village that is by the orphanage. This grandpa is always holding his baby and it makes me happy because they usually have the older siblings taking care of the children.

 

This is Luke. Isn’t he adorable? When we were taking pictures for the sponsors I looked over and he smiled at me so I took a picture and this is it! He’s so photogenic.

 

On the morning walks we generally see a lot of cow poo on everything. The people here pick up poop as soon as it drops and either put it on houses, trees, or sticks. When it is dried they use it for their fires. It maybe gross but they are using their resources!

 

Here is a picture of the last village Sabbath school. They are all coloring pictures of Naaman. You can see some of the village ladies sitting in the background.

 

Although this is not a very good picture of me I am putting it up for you to see that I am in Bangladesh. I don’t have many pictures of myself because they are all on other people’s cameras. I am with Luke, Jamie (in my arm), and Joni!

Thank you for reading my blog even though I am not the best writer J

I hope you enjoyed the pictures! 

Trip to Dhaka

(Warning: this is a long post and may contain lots of errors because I’m too tired to edit it)

             Our trip into Dhaka started on Sunday night. At around 10 pm we got on a bus that looked like it was nice at one point in time (and it probably is way nicer than some of the buses here) but it was covered in dirt and had lights that looked like they were from a 70’s themed kitchen. I sat by Lauren and we stayed awake for the first little while because we were afraid of our stuff getting stolen but as the night continued we became to exhausted to care about our stuff so we fell asleep. Every time I woke up I would be so afraid; there were so many times that our bus almost hit oncoming traffic. I could literally see the bus shifting every time the driver would swerve out of the way. Finally I decided it was best to just close my eyes so that I wouldn’t realize how many times I almost died. I never want to go on a bus like that again.
             We were suppose to arrive at 5:30 in the morning so that we could sleep for two hours before we rushed off to beat the Dhaka traffic but since we hit so many traffic jams on the way into Dhaka we didn’t arrive to our destination until around 8 or 9. The traffic in Dhaka is horrible because this is one of the most densely populated countries in the world.
             As soon as we ate some rice and dhal we were off to New Dhaka to begin our shopping for the kids. It was a very long day and by the end of it I was so emotional I just wanted to bawl.  There are so many people that you can barely breathe and when you do you wished that you hadn’t.  An open sewer runs along the road and the smell of the people alone makes you sick. I just cried when I was finally alone because of the things that I saw. Crippled people are everywhere begging and most of them are that way because their family members maimed them so they could earn money. The parents drug kids so that they don’t make a sound while the parent is begging… I wish I could explain everything but it is so hard when I have nothing to compare it to. It seems as if the worst places in America are equivalent to the nice places in Bangladesh. How can I look at a beggar who obviously needs my money more than I do and tell him no or give him two, ten, or even fifty taka (1 dollar = 78 taka)? Yet so many look at you with these haunting eyes that have felt so much pain in this life and you want to give them everything.  I thought of Peter and John when they healed the beggar in Acts 3, I wanted to tell these people “Silver and gold have I none but what I have I give unto thee.” But I can’t heal (or maybe I don’t have enough faith). I felt so helpless and hopeless. It was too much for me to handle on so little sleep. 
              After a bucket shower and some more rice and dhal (I’m tired of eating it already) I fell asleep in the dental clinic terrified of what the next day would bring.
             Despite my fears for Tuesday it turned out to be a rather pleasant day even though I saw worse stuff than I did the day before. First we stopped at stadium market because we needed a restroom.
I haven’t decided what is better: Dehydration or using the bathrooms in the city. They were gross.. enough said. 
Next we went to this sketchy factory looking place with a million shops in it. Mrs. Waid is very interesting shopper. I am one of those odd girls that doesn’t enjoy shopping for long periods of time. I like to just be done with it. However, Mrs. Waid is one of those shoppers who takes her time and can go all day. I’m going to be honest and say that it was boring until Lauren and I started wandering off to find things to look at. Bargaining for things is so fun here (whether or not I am good at it is to be questioned). Lauren thought that everything should be worth 50 taka so we would go up to people in the shops and when they would ask for some really high price we would say “no.. 50 taka.” They just laughed at our bargaining skills.
             In the afternoon we made our way to Old Dhaka. Since it had rained in the morning the streets were covered in mud. We had to make our way down this extremely packed muddy street for about half a mile to get to the fabric stores. There was a man behind me whistling but it had an Indian hint to its melody. It helped make the experience more positive than it could have been. The Bengali people just stare at us everywhere we go but it seemed to be worse when we were in Old Dhaka. We basically get tons of attention anywhere that we go. While Mrs. Waid was haggling for some fabric I notice this little girl. She was about 10 years old and she looked horribly dirty there was stuff in her hair and she had no shoes. She had been following us around for a while like most people do. I tried to talk with her a little bit but the language barrier kept us from really communicating. So I simply smiled at her every time we made eye contact and it made her so happy (I bet she had never gotten attention from a white person before). Simpson had bought me bananas (in Bengali they are called colas) and I offered her one, I think it made her day. There are so many kids here that need love and food but in the city they live in they have no chance. It really makes me think positively about the orphanage and what they are doing. They are saving the kids from living on the streets where they would either have to beg, work, or end up in the sex trade. Bangla Hope is saving children and it is beautiful.
             After that encounter we took a rickshaw ride to another part of town and it was so fun. I feel bad for the poor little men who pedal the bikes that power the rickshaw. They must have some buff legs because I’ve seen them tow a family of 5 on those things. We road back on a rickshaw van that an old man was pedaling and he was able to tow 5 of us plus all the fabric that we had bought. It was intense.
             When we got back to the dental clinic we had more rice and dhal and that ended the second day in Dhaka. Random fact: I have had rice and dahl every meal that I have been in Dhaka.  I am so ready to get back and eat Shati’s cooking!!
             Today (Wednesday) we finally got to shop for things that we liked. It was a pleasant day where we went to nice shops and ate good food. We didn’t buy much because everything is expensive in Gulshan. There was a mini grocery store that we went to and we bought some oatmeal (all of us have been craving it) the first bag we found was almost $10! I wanted to buy Muesli but it was just as expensive. We finally bought two little cans of rolled oats for $5. It will be worth it!
             I am so excited to get back to the orphanage and see the kids! We leave tomorrow at 6 A.M. Pray for us!

The Flexible Life of a Missionary

             I have never been a flexible person. I cannot even touch my toes without bending my knees. However, when you are in the mission field you have to become extremely flexible because everything’s is always changing.
             Today was one of those days where I got to practice my flexibility. I felt a little stressed about all the things that I had to do and it turned out that most of the plans that I have been relying on have changed.  I was supposed to start teaching tomorrow and today was a day to prep me for that. This morning at breakfast we were informed that we might be going into Dhaka tonight at 11 on the public bus. Now it is official that we will be leaving tonight and returning Thursday morning. This means that my teaching is delayed for a while. Classes go from Sunday-Thursday here and I will be leaving next Sunday to pick up three babies from a village. Who knows when I will be able to really start teaching?
             We will be buying things for the kids in Dhaka and doing other random tasks that need to be done. Please pray that we will have a safe trip tonight. The buses are pretty sketchy here and I’m going to be exhausted the next few days because we have to stay up all night.

This shall be interesting.

I might not be able to update you until Thursday night (your Wednesday morning)!

God's In Control

“Always be joyful. Keep on praying. No matter what happens, always be thankful for this is God’s will for you who belong to Christ Jesus.” 1 Thessalonians 5:16-17

What a beautiful Sabbath this was.
              We decided to go to the English Sabbath School but when we got to the Waid’s house Mr. Waid was sleeping so we decided not to disturb him. This gave us plenty of time to read our Bibles and old guides/insights. Church was really good too even though the sound equipment is absolutely dreadful.
             At the end of church we found out that we were suppose to have lunch at two, which is the time that we usually do the village Sabbath school. So I went to find Pastor Ponwell (I’m not sure how to spell it) to ask him if we could move the time of the Sabbath school. He told me that he would rather just do it at two but he wanted me to eat but I insisted on going at two (I was suppose to tell the story) and that I would get food after it was over. By the time two rolled around Lauren, Heather, and I went down stairs but Ponwell was nowhere so we decided to ask the waids where he was. The Waid’s convinced us to sit down and eat while we were waiting for him to show up. I ate super fast and kept checking to see if anyone was out there but I couldn’t tell if anyone was leaving the gate. I decided that I should go ask some of the older kids if a few of their friends had gone to help with the Sabbath school (our kids help out with song service). The kids told me that they had already left so I ran back into the kitchen to tell everyone. Mr. Waid saw my distress so he asked someone if they could take us to the village school on the rickshaw van.
             Not sure if we would make it in time for me to tell the story of Naaman I prayed that God would work everything out. When we got to the village school we ran into the courtyard but realized that Ponwell wasn’t there and neither were any of our kids! All the village kids saw that we were there so they gathered together on their mats and looked at us with expecting eyes. We had no translator (besides the teacher who spoke little English) so we just started singing songs. They didn’t know all the English songs we sang and there were definitely some awkward moments but we just kept on pushing through hoping that Ponwell would show up soon. The village kids really liked it when we did father Abraham even though they had no clue what they were saying. I kept giving the Sabbath school to Jesus knowing that everything would work out the way that he wanted it to. We did song service for about twenty to twenty five mins (poor kids hahah) and then we heard the rickshaw van coming with Ponwell and the kids!!
             They sang three more songs and then I told the story of Naaman and how God had healed him and then Ponwell translated it all. Then we gave out colored crayons and some coloring sheets. When they had finished they were suppose to come show it to us and then we would give them a little treat. It ended up being a really good Sabbath school and I’m pretty sure the kids enjoyed it a lot. God is definitely working in these villages. Not only do we get 30-40 kids that are Muslim or Hindu but we also get a large crowd of adults who stand along the fence and watch as well.
             We found out later that Ponwell had arranged it so that we could eat at 2 and be in the village at 3 but he had neglected to tell us that he had done this. Oh well. Everything went the way that God wanted it to go.
             God is teaching me so much here it is amazing. I’m learning how to lean on Him in new ways. He is also showing me some things that I have been holding onto in my life and that I am not letting Him have full control! These are things that I was just beginning to realize in America but I don’t think that I would have been able to really let go and surrender all. In Bangladesh I have no choice. God is so Good, He is perfecting me so that I can become more and more like Him! Amen. 

I Wouldn’t Have it Any Other Way

              God gave me plenty of time to spend with Him today. It really refreshed me and reminded me that He knows best and He has a reason for me to be here. I was reading one of my old prayer journals from May and I realized that I had no clue what was coming when I was praying about going to Bangladesh. One of my fellow Student Missionary friends said it best when she was describing how her trip was going so far, “God has already shattered every expectation that I had about how this year would go.... He's definitely been teaching me a thing or two about faith, gratitude, and humility.” This year may not be going the way that I thought it would go but it is definitely going the way that God wants it to go. I feel as if He is cleansing me of all the things that are not of Him so that I can become more humble, grateful, and faithful.
 
             Deuteronomy 30:6 “The Lord your God will clean your heart… so that you will love Him with all your heart and soul and so you may live.” My Lord knows best!

              After God renewed my spirit I was ready to hang out with the kids again. I bounced out of the room and began hanging out with a group of the older kids. One of the kids asked me what my mother’s name was and so I decided that it would be best if I showed them a picture so they could see her. So I ran up stairs to my room and grabbed all the pictures that I had of my family. I told them all to “bacho” (sit) and I started telling them about each one of my family members. When they saw my mom and little sister Lila they kept saying “Shundar,” which means beautiful/attractive.  One of the little girls Joni kept on kissing the pictures of Lila, my mom, and me. They thought it was funny how my Dad and brothers all had the same chin as me; the kids really love my dimples. When I looked up I realized that a crowd had grown and there were even some caregivers in the group who had the biggest smiles. It really helped my homesickness to tell the kids about my family back at home.
             I was running around with the kids all evening so by the time the sunset I was exhausted and just wanted to sit. Luke came and faithfully held my hand even thought I was being a boring playmate. I can honestly say that I don’t have a favorite kid here because I love them all but I have a special place in my heart for Luke. His skin is so dark and beautiful and he has the cutest little face with big eyes and loooong eyelashes. Every night he gives me a kiss on both of my cheeks and tells me goodnight. Oh my word, that boy has stolen my heart hahaha. I suppose I’m falling in love with all the kids and I wouldn’t have it any other way.

(Please continue to leave comments on my posts. You have no clue how happy it makes me to have so much encouragement)

Spiders, Smoothies, and the Market Place

            Mornings seem to be the worst. I go to bed happy every night but by the time I wake up in the morning I become miserably homesick. That is why the morning walks that Mrs. Waid goes on are good for me; it forces me out of bed and into the Bangladesh culture. This morning was a holiday where the people received their gods again (the ones that they threw into the water last week). There are several stations where they place their gods along the roadside and they had loud music playing. Although I don’t believe in their plastic gods I find their devotion inspiring. I think the Christians in America should celebrate God and his Love everyday like it is a celebration. Everyday is a gift from God.
             After the walk I came back to my room to have my devotions. In the middle of my reading Heather freaked out and exclaimed “THAT IS HUUUUGE.!” Being overly curious to what she was talking about I got up and walked over to her bed. I looked down to see the biggest spider I have ever seen in my life! With its legs it was about the size of my palm and it was super fast. Lauren and I wanted to take pictures of it so we got really close and all of a sudden it turned around and started running straight towards my feet. I seriously jumped up a couple feet in the air and landed on Heathers headboard. At this point we were all screaming and had our sandals in our hands prepared to TAKE THAT SPIDER DOWN! We lost sight of it for a few minutes and then it magically appeared on our table (it was like something from a horror film). It made its way under the tablecloth and against the side of the table top and Lauren started beating the place it was. I have never seen so many guts from just one bug. It was gross! Mrs. Waid told us they weren’t poisonous but that they ate the cockroaches and it was possible for them to get bigger. I would rather have a cockroach in my room.
             Us four white American girls (Mrs. Waid included) decided that we wanted to go to town this morning so we got our personal rickshaw van to take us. I absolutely love going to town on that thing. Everyone in town just stares at us so we have decided to smile and wave wildly back at them. It seems to make most them happy, especially the kids. I bough two more outfits because having just one daily outfit wasn’t really working out. We helped Mrs. Waid buy stuff for the orphanage’s laundry room and I bought a air tight Tupperware to keep the ants away from any food/cough drop that they decide to go after. Overall it was a successful trip and I’m beginning to learn my way around the market place!
             When we got back from shopping we had mango smoothies and then we had the meeting to find out what classes Lauren and I would be teaching. I am teaching 2^nd graders English/math and 3^rd graders health. I am so nervous about being a teacher. Please pray for me; I start being a teacher on Sunday. I’m not sure they realize that I have no clue what I’m doing.
             God’s got it all under control… I have to remember that. 

Focus on the Rose not the Thorns

   Earlier today I wrote a blog that was rather pessimistic (I ended up not posting it) and then I received a comment from Constance Spano on my last blog entry. In it she told me to focus on the rose and not on the thorns. In other words focus on the good things and not the bad things that are happening around you. As soon as I read that I began to look at things in a more positive light. I am now making a list of the things that I like about being here or that I am thankful for no matter how small they are:

-The food is good (tonight for dinner I had curried string beans and then for dessert we had ice cream that tasted homemade)
-I love when the kids yell my name from across the campus
-When you ring the doorbell it plays a little song
-I get to go for a walk every morning and attempt to speak bangla with the villagers
-The kids draw me pictures
-I have a western toilet and shower
-I HAVE AC IN MY ROOM (although electricity is unpredictable it is still especially appreciated at night time)

My new goal is to push out the bad things and only embrace the good.
             After I got done using the Internet Heather, Lauren, and I went down to finish the pictures. We took the rest of them this morning but now it was the hard part of figuring out which name went with each kid. We couldn’t find any of the caretakers so we decided to find one of the kids that spoke English well. Lauren went and came back with Danny. We sat on Mrs. Waids porch as Danny identified each of the kids. Mrs. Waid came up by the time we were done and let us into her cold house (It felt so good). I am keeping whatever snacks I have left from the ants in their fridge and I decided that Danny deserved a treat for helping us. I pulled out my bag of Dark Chocolate covered pomegranates and gave him a few while telling him “I’m not sure you will like these.” The moment that the chocolate hit his tongue he got so excited and exclaimed how good it was. It made me so happy. Chocolate is everyone’s friend!
             Eventually I made my way back to my room to put my computer away and I noticed that my bed was covered in ants yet again. My package of ricolas had attracted all the ants in the country to a party on MY bed. Determined to save my delicious treats I took them out on the porch and began to de-ant each package. I was so focused that it took several minutes for me to realize that there were people below me talking. I glanced down and noticed a group of about 10-15 villagers just staring at me. Feeling rather friendly I waved at them and yelled “Nomasgar” (a Hindu Greeting). They all pathetically replied and then continued staring at me as I worked. It made me laugh; they were probably wondering what this crazy white girl was doing banging little packaged cough drops on her railing.
             So maybe I lied when I told you that I had conquered the ants. They are unstoppable. I am just thankful that God answered my prayers and there are no ants on my bed right now.


Update: I wont have pictures up for a while because we are only aloud to use 1 G a month and I'm still using Heather's internet. I'm sorry. :( 

Going Native

              As soon as my foot steps outside the apartment building children mob me. There is so much love here! The other day I was in the yard hanging out with a few of the children and then I had to run up my four flights of stairs to grab my water bottle. I took my time fiddling around with things in my room and then I glanced out my window. To my right all the kids were gathered around Heather, Lauren, and Kerri. When I glanced the other direction I saw Luke, Chrissy, and Joni (these are a few of the kids that have favored me over the other girls) all of them were sitting around by themselves waiting for ME to come back down. It made me feel so loved and needed. I received two colored papers today from Tisha and Deborah. Tisha’s says “Teacher Cantal I love you so mush.” I may not be her teacher yet but it is still sweet! Another girl told me that when I left she would cry every day. Yes, I am definitely feeling the love.
             I have a few of the kids names down but it has been rather difficult getting to know all the children’s names since there are 115 of them! At the same time I am trying to learn Bangla and all the caregivers names. A few words and phrases I’ve learned are:

-Camonachu (How are you?)
-Balo Achi (I’m good)
-Nomasgar (Hindu Greeting)
-Ami Tomo que balo achi (I love you)
-Namkey (name)
-coo coo (dog)

Of course none of these are spelled right but you get the point. We had a photo shoot with the kids so that their sponsors could receive up to date photos of their child. This has helped me learn many names but it has been so difficult to make some of these kids smile. There is this one boy name Jamie and he will not smile at all! Lauren says it looks as if he is solving the world’s problems because his face looks so serious and sad all the time. Another girl cried every time they put her in front of the camera. Slowly but surely we will get all these kids photos taken!
             In other news we have received our Shama camis. This is the outfit that the women here wear. It is a long shirt with pants that kind of look like Pajama pants and of course the olna (scarf). It took four days for them to get tailored and my pants are a little short. It was so much fun shopping for them. We went into town with Bani and Ellen, two ladies that work at the orphanage. They would take us to a shop that had all sorts of fabric that was already made into the shirts and pants they just needed to be tailored. When you go into a store you are suppose to sit on these stools that are set up for anyone who is buying something. We told them that we wanted cotton because it is the coolest material and then they would start throwing down different packages of fabric.
             I bought three, each of them were about 500-600 taka, which is around 8-9 U.S. dollars. After you buy them you take the fabric to the tailor and they make them fit perfectly for you, although I don’t think they did a very good job.
             We went into town (5 in the back seat) and picked the outfits up yesterday and then we got to ride back on a rickshaw van. This is a flat piece of wood that is pulled by a motorcycle.  It was so much fun but at the same time completely terrifying when you see a huge truck coming at you from the other direction and when it passes you it is only a foot away. All the women here are so excited to see us dressed like them. They are telling us that we are real Bangali woman now. Watch out I’m going native!! 

Resting in Jesus

“Rest in God. He is able to keep that which you have committed to Him. If you will leave yourself in His hands, He will bring you off more than a conqueror through Him that has loved you” (Steps to Christ 73).

             I’m going to be honest with you at this moment in time I don’t feel as if I am really needed at Bangla Hope. Since I just arrived I don’t really have a job set up for me (although they are telling me that I will be teaching English and a few other subjects soon). The only thing that is keeping me going is the realization that Jesus put me here for a reason.. whatever that may be.
             When I was leaving for Bangladesh I was worried that my bags that were too heavy might have to be emptied of some of the precious cargo they carried.  I was several pounds over according to my grandpa’s scale and it was stressing me out. My mom and Grandma prayed with me about it and later when I would bring something up about it my mom would simply say “Chantel, you gave it to Jesus. Leave it in His hands.” In turned out that we were actually 4 pounds under!
             Now I am here and I feel overwhelmed and stressed but I have forgotten that I have committed myself to Jesus and now I may rest in Him. Isn’t it amazing that we have a God who cares so much about us.

Just for You Readers

   I have had trouble getting internet and still do not have it on my computer. Therefore I will be posting pictures that go along with the posts later on when I finally figure out how to get internet with a mac computer.

Thanks for reading :)

The First Sabbath

      Today was like a roller coaster of emotions. It started out with a lovely walk where I got to mingle with the village people that literally live right behind my apartment. We then ate a wonderful breakfast and went to visit the Sabbath schools. All of us missionary girls who were suppose to be observing the Sabbath schools and seeing how they worked ended up telling stories in the classes and singing up front. I thought it was bad when Pastor Greg asked me to talk in front of chapel the night before but these people asked me to tell a story a few minutes before they pushed me up front. By the time church rolled around I was to exhausted and the thought of sitting in a stuffy hot building sweating like crazy didn’t sound appealing. During the sermon I had too much time to think since I couldn’t really understand what was being said even though it was translated. I began to feel a little home sick and I wanted to crawl back into my shell of comfort at home. Last Sabbath was such a wonderful day where my mom and sibling came to visit me before I left and now I was sitting on a mat dripping with sweat (I know they say that girls don’t sweat “they glisten” but obviously those girls have not been to Bangladesh). The pastor approached us after church and asked us if we would go to the village Sabbath School at 2:00 and we all hesitantly agreed.
            There was about two hours until we had to leave so we all decided that a Sabbath nap sounded beautiful!  I brushed some bugs off my bed and laid down, I felt like never moving again. I’m not sure if I’ll ever get use to this heat, humidity, or simply just being out of my comfort zone. Prayers began to bubble in my head as I surrendered my unwilling and uncomfortable spirit to the only one who can change my outlook. Just as I was beginning to fall asleep Danny came and rang our doorbell (we didn’t even realize we had a door bell until then) and he told us that it was time to go for a walk in the village. Lauren, Heather, and I stumbled out and threw our olna’s (scarf’s) around our necks. Danny was waiting at the bottom and he popped out and scared Heather and Lauren who were ahead of me. Hearing all this commotion I decided that I would pop out and scare Danny. So I jumped around the corner and yelled “BOO.” He jumped back and began laughing hysterically. At that point I realized that God had renewed my spirit.
            By two we were ready to walk to the other end of the village (I have walked 5 or 6 miles in 96-100 degree weather by this point). The village road is gorgeous though it is raised up high to keep it above the rice fields and lined with trees to give shade to everyone walking along the path. Sabbath school was actually really fun of course we were put on the spot once again and asked to tell the story and come up with a new song (how are we suppose to know what songs they know?). Lauren told the story about Jesus feeding the 5000 and the village kids who are all from hindu and muslim families listened intently to this story that they had probably never heard before. I think next week is my turn to tell a story (does anyone have a suggestion of one I should tell? Hahah).
            God is so amazing. Even though I have been so overwhelmed and cannot focus completely on Him all the time because I am so stinking hot He is still with me every moment. He knows that all of this is hard for me and He will give me the strength to get through this time here in Bangladesh. Thank goodness we have a God who cares soooo deeply for us.