He stood there with his face completely full of anger and then it turned to sadness as the tears began to flood his eyes. Danny didn’t say anything to me as he just stared into my eyes with sorrow that could not be matched. It was my fault.
Earlier today Luke had come to my room and found a little booklet that Danny had given to Heather for Kelsey (the previous Student Missionary). I didn’t really pay attention when Brent and Luke began to draw all over the blank pages. By the time night came Luke dragged me to the boys room so that he could draw me more pictures to put on my wall. While he was busy doing that I was getting overwhelmed with tons of kisses from the other boys (wow that sentence sounds a little funny haha). I was filled with joy as all the boys were so happy with me and that is when Danny came storming in. He stood there for 5 minutes and didn’t say a word to me, he just slowly began to cry. Then the ladies started giving the familiar hints that it was time for me to go so that the boy could go to bed.
Now I sit here feeling terrible about the silliest thing. I’m really hoping that Danny is like the average kid that will just forget in about a day. But it isn’t just that I made him completely angry or mad it was also that you could see his love for Kelsey in every tear that he let run down his face and I felt like I had insulted it. Most of these kids have rejection issues or need a lot of attention and love because they don’t have parents to spoil them. No matter how silly I think the matter is that he cried it still breaks my heart and I feel like a terrible person. Earlier today I felt like I could conquer the world and now I feel like the lowest scum of the earth. I don’t even know what to do to make it right.
Many times in my life I don’t really know what to do or what the right way is and because of that I have made so many mistakes. It is hard to know what to do sometimes but I believe that as we focus on Jesus that everything will work it’s way out. I may have made Danny sad but I cannot let the Devil get me down because of that one thing. Satan really has been working hard at not only making me upset but also the other people here. I have to remember that I am a conqueror because of Christ.
Earlier today I wrote this (before Danny got upset): “They say that with the death of Christ you can conquer anything and today I feel like a conqueror even though I haven’t done anything particularly amazing. I simply feel like I have conquered the day because I am not letting my fears overwhelm me and I am claiming the blood of Jesus! “
Satan can’t mess with the power that comes as a result of Jesus’ death on the cross! Therefore I shouldn’t let my fears about teaching, being away from home, or having Danny hate me forever keep me away from doing God’s will.
I may still feel horrible but I will just go to bed tonight and tomorrow I’ll say sorry to Danny somehow.
Earlier today Luke had come to my room and found a little booklet that Danny had given to Heather for Kelsey (the previous Student Missionary). I didn’t really pay attention when Brent and Luke began to draw all over the blank pages. By the time night came Luke dragged me to the boys room so that he could draw me more pictures to put on my wall. While he was busy doing that I was getting overwhelmed with tons of kisses from the other boys (wow that sentence sounds a little funny haha). I was filled with joy as all the boys were so happy with me and that is when Danny came storming in. He stood there for 5 minutes and didn’t say a word to me, he just slowly began to cry. Then the ladies started giving the familiar hints that it was time for me to go so that the boy could go to bed.
Now I sit here feeling terrible about the silliest thing. I’m really hoping that Danny is like the average kid that will just forget in about a day. But it isn’t just that I made him completely angry or mad it was also that you could see his love for Kelsey in every tear that he let run down his face and I felt like I had insulted it. Most of these kids have rejection issues or need a lot of attention and love because they don’t have parents to spoil them. No matter how silly I think the matter is that he cried it still breaks my heart and I feel like a terrible person. Earlier today I felt like I could conquer the world and now I feel like the lowest scum of the earth. I don’t even know what to do to make it right.
Many times in my life I don’t really know what to do or what the right way is and because of that I have made so many mistakes. It is hard to know what to do sometimes but I believe that as we focus on Jesus that everything will work it’s way out. I may have made Danny sad but I cannot let the Devil get me down because of that one thing. Satan really has been working hard at not only making me upset but also the other people here. I have to remember that I am a conqueror because of Christ.
Earlier today I wrote this (before Danny got upset): “They say that with the death of Christ you can conquer anything and today I feel like a conqueror even though I haven’t done anything particularly amazing. I simply feel like I have conquered the day because I am not letting my fears overwhelm me and I am claiming the blood of Jesus! “
Satan can’t mess with the power that comes as a result of Jesus’ death on the cross! Therefore I shouldn’t let my fears about teaching, being away from home, or having Danny hate me forever keep me away from doing God’s will.
I may still feel horrible but I will just go to bed tonight and tomorrow I’ll say sorry to Danny somehow.
Your love for Danny and the life you live as a witness of Jesus will be sufficient. everybody but Jesus makes mistakes that's why he has to be our example. You are an amazing women who will give all the kids there what they need. He and you will be fine.^_^ Well more later love ya
ReplyDeleteThank you for this post, Chantel. :)
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